What I Now Know

Has anything ever affected your mind so much that you just can’t seem to think straight? My mind has been on overdrive for over the last two months. In fact, I feel like I can’t even think back that far to put into pieces what life has been like. It hasn’t been bad. Far from it. Just a bit inconvenient. Most of you already knew that we experienced more water damage in our condo back in December. December 5th, actually. Is it weird that I remember the exact date? For those that have missed it, here is the back story:

We were at church on the morning of December 5th and had been looking forward to a Christmas party with friends that afternoon. On our way from church to the party (it’s a bit far out in the country) we received a phone call from the unit below us with the information that water was leaking into their unit. As Matt handled the phone call, I’m pretty sure that I sat silent and still in the passenger seat, staring straight ahead, thinking, “No, this can’t be happening. Not again.” My mind immediately flashed through all the appliances in our house that use water. Did I do a load of laundry? No. Did I turn the dishwasher on? No. The sink? The tub? Our water heater? No, it couldn’t be ours. That sucker was only two years old! If it was, I’m fairly confident that I was trying to figure out in my mind who I was going to call and yell at first. What in the world! We were only about 10 minutes away from our house, but what an eternity it seemed like to me. When we arrived and stepped into our unit, sure enough we could hear dripping sounds. Not from the living room area or the kitchen (like the previous incident) but from our bedroom. Water was streaming down through the center of our fan. I burst into tears at the sight. I mean who wants to see their home destroyed? It had to have been going for a couple of hours by now. The water stains on the ceiling were evident and stretched from one side of the room to the other. Our door frame was leaking and the carpet and bed were soaked.

Frantically, we moved things away from the center of the room and placed a plastic bin on the edge of the bed to collect the water that was still dripping. For the next several minutes, we would try to get in contact with the owner upstairs. No one had a name or number. He wasn’t answering his door. His car wasn’t in the parking lot. There was no way to shut the water off! Finally an employee from the city came to see about turning the water off from an outside source and the owner of the third floor unit finally answered his door. With that resolved, we now had what I knew would be a long road ahead of us. And why do these things always happen on a weekend? No one would come out until the following day. So, seeing the state that our bedroom was in and the fact that we didn’t know how the water had affected the electricity in that area of our house, we gathered up important belongings and some clothes and headed to my parent’s house for what would turn into a two month stay. As the days went by we gathered more of our valuables so that they wouldn’t be affected by moisture in the house. We moved more things around, trying to empty out much of the bedroom for the drying out phase of repair. And then we waited. Waited for the repair company to bring in their drying equipment. Waited for the condo to dry. Weather was not on our side. It was cold and wet outside and had snowed a time or two during this process. What usually would take 3-5 days turned into two weeks.

Finally, after two weeks of drying the walls, floors and ceiling out, the repairs could finally start. Oh, the repairs. Let’s just say that when the time comes to sell this place, just about everything will be “new”. Right down to the concrete subfloor in the bedroom. New walls, new ceilings, new paint, new floors, new carpet. So, for weeks we would wait for repairs to be completed. The process was slow as there were certain things that had to sit for a few days after being completed. Throughout this time, we struggled. We struggled with knowing how to handle the whole situation from an insurance point of view. If we filed a claim against our insurance, we’d get slammed with either an increase in premiums or a kick to the curb since this wasn’t the first one. We struggled with frustration and (a little anger for me) over the “fault” of this situation and who should really pay for it. I really struggled with the “fairness” of it all. After all, life isn’t fair, is it? We struggled with our own agent being of no help to us at all through the process. We struggled when the insurance company of the owner in the unit above us retracted their findings that he was at fault and now said that he wasn’t. They wouldn’t be paying for the claim. We struggled with the manager of our homeowner’s association because for some reason they now have to be involved in situations like these. (That was a new policy that came out right after our previous water incident. How nice.) Now, we could be facing the possibility of having to pay part of their deductible which was way more than what ours was! We struggled with making the right decisions and taking the opinions of others to heart and really deciding what was best for us.

Now, as we are on the heels of bidding Winter goodbye and welcoming in the coming of Spring, we’re on the other side of things. We’ve come out of that valley (and are just waiting on the bills now.) I can’t sit here and tell you that I’ve gained new insight into life or that I know why this happened again. I don’t. I don’t really understand it all still. I have no great wisdom to share from it. But there are some things that I do know and that I will rest in and forever be grateful for. I know I have a Father who doesn’t promise that life will be easy or painless, but He does promise to remain with me and that He is faithful to all of His promises. I know the Lord is a God who is unchanging, even when the circumstances around me change. I know that even through what seems like silence or confusion, my God is at work. I know that in the midst of the valleys that we walk through is where the most growth happens. I know that my God provides for all of our needs. I know that I have a husband who takes care of me and goes to bat, working things out for our family so that life can resume to normal. I know that our young marriage was tested but that we stood together through this storm. I know that we have parents (and in-laws) who still sacrifice for us as their children even though we are grown adults. For two months we stayed in their house, used their electricity, used their water, and added to their food bill. For two months, we were in their space (they are empty nesters). For two months, we were able to enjoy meals together with them almost every night. I know that a parent’s love is something I am unable to comprehend at this stage in my life, but that it’s real. (Mom and Dad, thank you. We won’t ever be able to repay you for taking us in when we needed a place to go.)

I know that we have a neighbor who might just need to hear about Jesus. I know that he feels terrible about the whole situation but that he, too, needs to know that he is forgiven and that we don’t have any hard feelings towards him. Perhaps a dinner invitation will be in the future. I know that a lot of positives came out of a negative. Yes, being put out of our house was disheartening and inconvenient, but we experienced some great things because of it and during it! On Christmas morning we went with my family to serve the homeless and needy around the Raleigh area. Seeing how blessed I was regardless of my house situation helped me to put things into perspective and experience a Christmas that was truly meaningful. When it snowed on Christmas night, we woke up to a winter wonderland and spent the entire day playing in the snow and staying warm inside with my whole family. Yep, all at one time! Parents, siblings, nephews and dogs! I can’t remember the last time that we were all together in the same place. (If we had been in our own house, we probably wouldn’t have ventured out in the snow and missed out on that!) I gave my notice and resigned from my job at Celebration Cottage. That’s a big one. (But don’t worry. You can take the girl out of a design office, but you can’t take the design out of the girl. More about that and what I’ve been doing since to come in a separate post.)

I know that I will never take 700 square feet of living space for granted again. Even if it’s small, it’s our home and nothing can compare. I know that we now have a peaceful, adult bedroom that makes me smile every time I walk into it. Oh, and a new mattress too! For the longest time I have been wanting to repaint the walls and get rid of all the stuff so that our bedroom would be a place of rest. I hated that room. And the mattress was so old I slept with a small pillow nestled under my back so that it wouldn’t ache. But now, we have newly painted walls, the stuff is gone and I was finally able to pull out the pillows and duvet cover that we received as wedding gifts. I washed our down comforter that I was convinced would be lost but was pleasantly surprised that it could be salvaged. Our bed is heavenly. Our room is finally a place of rest.

I know that we have new carpet throughout the house which was also on my wish list. After spending a couple years with it getting worse with stains, we now have a clean slate! Well, not to get dirty again, but you know what I mean. It’ll be a good selling point too! I know that I now had the opportunity to get rid of stuff that we don’t need or use and to clean house. Besides, just about everything in the house had to be moved and cleaned in order for repairs to be made. Now, I had the chance (or perhaps was forced) to clean out the old which leads to a more tidy and peaceful home. I guess you could say that we were pretty blessed throughout the whole situation. Perhaps it was a test of patience. Perhaps not. Perhaps it was just something that would make us turn around at the end and see firsthand all that we do have and how much we are loved. Perhaps it was just a detour to get our eyes focused on our unchanging God when life seems to crumble all around. I don’t know and maybe I never will, this side of heaven, but I am grateful. I wouldn’t want it all to happen again, but I am thankful for what has come out of it and what I learned through it. With confidence, I can say that it was truly worth it.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

~James 1:2-4

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.

~ James 1:12